The Church's Unfoundation

A bit naughty this, but it made me laugh so I'm going to post it. This new 'TEC hymn' is circulating on a number of lists, so I thought some of our readers here might like to see it too. Read on...

The Anglican Communion
Was mightily distressed
When bishops of ECUSA
Their heresies expressed,
And in Convention showed not
Repentance or regret,
But chose to walk their own path,
Firm in their own ways set.

Political correctness
And chic diversity –
These are our church's hallmarks,
And quite our cup of tea.
We follow where the winds blow,
We are the church of NOW.
We're new Episcopalians
And trendier than thou.

Our gospel is inclusive.
(The other one's passé.)
We welcome all the sexes,
Transgendered, lesbigay.
And though we're loudly preaching
Our relevant good news,
We are a tad perplexed by
So many empty pews.

"To God alone be glory" -
This used to be our song.
With Katharine Jefferts Schori
It likely won't be long
Before we change our story
And sing another tune -
Not Father, Son and Spirit,
But Mother, Child and Womb.

Our church has no foundation
And Christ is not her Lord.
She is our new creation
By our own mighty word.
The Bible's too oppressive,
And morals leave us bored.
Who then is our salvation?
It's our own selves - adored

Comments

[Karen in Laguna Niguel]

Source?

(rg writes: I don't know, it's not been attributed to anyone on the two lists I read it on. If anyone can enlighten me, I will happily publish and link to the source and give full credit.)

[Fr Craig Sweeney]

Ruth - your pique at TEC is growing weary. This insulting piece, doubtlessly the work of one of the schismatics, is false and sad. They love to find isolated examples of wierdness and claim that the whole TEC is like that. I was in a recent search for almost two years, examined hundreds of churches, and believe me, the vast majority proclaim the orthodox gospel of what God has done in Jesus - which, by the way, has little to do with archbishops and human sexuality. You seem to be an excellent reporter - sorry that you are ignoring the facts here in America, which is that a very few conservatives are engaged in a power struggle over property, not having the courage of their convictions to just leave if they must...

[Chris Gillibrand]

There is great tradition of such Anglican poetry. Here are three examples.

Stylistically, the piece is close to the poetry of the great theologian Eric Mascall but he has been dead for over a decade.

Just to show that nothing changes, a quote from one of his poems linked to above.

"The Bishop’s put me under his ‘profoundest disapproval’
And, though he cannot bring about my actual removal,
He will not come and visit me or take my confirmations.
Colonial prelates I employ from far-off mission-stations."

And this Mascall's
CHRISTMAS WITH THE DEMTTHOLOGIZERS

Hark, the herald angels sing:
'Bultmann is the latest thing!'
(Or they would if he had not Demythologized the lot.)
Joyful, all ye nations, rise,
Glad to existentialize!
Peace on earth and mercy mild,
God and Science reconciled.

Lo, the ancient myths disperse. Hence, three-storied universe!
Let three-decker pulpits stay : Bultmann has a lot to say,
Since Kerygma still survives
When the myths have lost their lives.

Hark, the herald angels sing
'Bultmann shot us on the wing!'

Dr Farrer we detect
Somewhat lacking in respect, Launching, with his puckish arts, Tiny well-directed darts;
While Herr Luther's lumpish sons Overload their massive guns, Blowing, when the barrel splits, Bultmann—and themselves—to bits.

Let us with a gladsome mind
Leave the ancient world behind. Modern man, rejoice with us!
We have read Copernicus.
While the herald angels sing :
'Bultmann ist ein gutes Ding!'
We respond in simple trust
'Demythologize or bust!'

[Malcolm+]

I'm not so naive as to believe that journalists can avoid all bias. I do believe, however, that a journalist does have a responsibility for fairness.

And yes, this is a blog, wherein the standards may be slightly looser.

But you are a journalist, and this blog is provided by your media employer. I'm not convinced you can cast aside the responsibility of fairness quite so blithely.

Yet week after week, post after post, we see dismissive, distorted and occasionally slanderous comments about the Episcopal Church, while the "other side" in the present dispute are treated with kit gloves. Your recent description of Akinola as the world's "most powerful" Anglican (laughable as it is) tops the positively hagiographic interview posted previously.

Now, if you want to cast aside your current profession and become a satirist, fine. But a good satirist is prepared to attack everyone's absurdity, regardless of side. America's Jon Stewart or Canada's Rick Mercer mock left and right in more or less equal measure.

Unless, of course, your desire is to become a polemicist - in which case you may be well on your way.

[Hwee-Chong Fong]

The original lyrics of this hymn are from 1868, shortly after the 1867 Lambeth Conference where the Colenso controversy was on the agenda.

I wonder if the author of this version had this in the back of his mind when putting his or her account of the current situation in the Anglican Communion.

[bls]

How do they slander? Let us count the ways. Well, everybody knows that some people will do anything to excuse their prejudices....

[John]

Apparently no one wants to remember how what is now called the Anglican Church was founded.

And that the Anglican Church was and is a very worldly power seeking institution--very much a part of the UK establishment---God, King & Country. And as such it (the church) also played an integral part in the British colonial invasion of much of the rest of the world.

As though Real God gave/gives his/her blessings to the wholesale theft and murder involved in ALL imperial invasions.

Wasnt it was founded by Henry VIII.
He was a serial killer, a mass murderer, and the "greatest" thief and vandal in English history.

Something is/was always very rotten at the foundation(s) of such a "church".

[Chris Gillibrand]

PS
"Farrer" in the poem was the formidable scholar, Austin Farrer, Warden of Keble College. He denied the existance of the Q source.

"Bultmann" is Rudolf Bultmann who discussions of myth led the Church of England so astray, notably in John Hick's The Myth of God Incarnate. Bultmann, to his credit, was a member of the anti-Nazi confessing church.

[The Omniscient Mussel]

Miss Mussel gets the feeling that other commenters need to unknot their knickers. Quite an amusing send-up. Thanks for posting.

[Dr. Irene Lancaster FRSA]

As a non-Anglican, I do not agree that Ruth is biased and she gives credit where it is due.

She also has a sense of humour, something sadly lacking in some!

[David Keen]

Serious people: come on, take a day off, let's have a chuckle or we'll all go mad.

Reminds me of a friend at our theological college who, in the early days of women priests, ripped off Billy Joel's 'Always a woman to me':

She can reverence in style, genuflect with a flair
She can keep you entranced with a flick of her hair
Then she'll hold up the elements so you can see
She looks like a priest but she's always a woman to me

Oh I consider it fine
If she takes bread and wine
In her kitchen at home
But if she starts that round here
Then I'm sorry my dear
I'll be heading for Rome

can't remember the rest of it, but it helped all of us laugh about an issue that was in danger of becoming unhealthily joyless in the life of the college community.

[Malcolm+]

If Ruth chooses to be a satirist, all power to her.

But in some months of reading this blog, all satire, all dismissal and all snark is directed at one side in the dispute. That is bias.

If anyone can point to a comparable post where Ruth has ripped (or even dared criticize) the so-called Global South leadership, I will happily withdraw.

I think it will be a long and fruitless search.

(rg writes: point taken on board Malcom.)

[Hugh of Lincoln]

One verse was omitted:

Though with a scornful wonder
Men see her sore opprest,
By schisms rent asunder,
By homophobia,
Yet gays their watch are keeping,
Their cry goes up 'How long?'
And soon the Lambeth meeting
Shall Gene walk with the throng?

[Nasty, Brutish and Short]

The verse is funny, and describes with dead on accuracy what is going on in the Episcopal Church in the U.S. Help us, please!

[Mike Homfray]

Yawn, yawn - the Church is a worthless institution, and most of its doctrines are outdated delusions.

There's no daddy-god-in-the-sky, and Jesus died in 33 AD.

Once the church realises that it may have something useful to say. Premodern supernaturalist hogwash - no thanks.

[Bob Ayers]

Well I thought it was funny, and some people should get a life.

[Michael Povey]

I "perceive" that Ruth Gledhill has a certain animus towards the Episcopal Church.

She should take understand that as far as her readers are concerned "perception is reality".

As a thirty one year veteran of Priesthood within the Episcopal Church, (a great and wonderful Church if ever there was one!), I "perceive" Ruth's bias against us as blogger, and with that in mind, tend not to trust her as a reporter.

[Mike Homfray]

And anyone naive enough to be taken in by Akinola , who fails to recognise the manipulative cunning and deep loathing he holds for gay people, does not inspire confidence

[Malcolm+]

Ruth has taken my comment on board.

Good. I'm satisfied.

I look forward to the satire about 51 bishops for a few thousand believers in about 100 congregations.

(rg responds: Malcolm, I didn't write that satire, someone else did. I posted it. I am still waiting to receive one putting the other point of view.)

[Malcolm+]

touche

You might take a boo at Mark Harris's blog which has an interesting set of proposed "rules" for how to be in communion.

http://anglicanfuture.blogspot.com/

Ten personal holy non-covenant communion principles

[shari]

"And soon the Lambeth meeting
Shall Gene walk with the throng?"

what?...what?...?...Oh "the _THRONG_"! I thought with "a thong"

My bad.

Never mind.