By ADRIAN TAHOURDIN
Bombay was renamed Mumbai in 1996,
largely at the instigation of Bal Thackeray, the firebrand politician who died
last year. Thackeray founded the Hindu far right Shiv Sena party, which
provoked inter-communal conflict between Hindus and Muslims both in
the city and across India. As for “Bombay”, he felt the name had too many
associations with the city’s colonial past – its replacement is said to honour
the city’s patron deity, the Goddess Mumbadevi. What, I wonder, did Thackeray
make of his own surname, one which his father adopted out of admiration for the
Victorian novelist?
The writer Suketu Mehta relates a
tense interview with Thackeray in his brilliant contemporary chronicle of his native
city, Maximum City: Bombay lost and found (2004) - what must be one of the last
books with the old name in its title. At one point Thackeray firmly corrects
Mehta’s use of the name “Bombay”.
Mehta points out that if the fourth
largest city in the world in terms of population “were a country by
itself in 2004, it would rank fifty-four”. On reflection it’s extraordinary
that this megalopolis of 20 million plus should have changed its name so easily – was
there any protest? I don’t remember now. Admittedly the old name is clearly
recognizable in the new one. But nevertheless can you imagine Boris Johnson as
mayor of London deciding to rename the city Londinium? Think of the
administrative upheaval.
But as Mehta wrote ten years ago:
“name-changing is in vogue in all of India nowadays: Madras has been renamed
Chennai, Calcutta, that British-made city, changed its name to
Kolkata”. Bangalore has since become Bengaluru (but will that one ever
properly catch on, with its unnecessary extra syllable?). I loved the
name Madras, but I appreciate these decisions aren’t made with my
aesthetic preferences in mind. And there’s something to be said for a proper
name change like Madras to Chennai, a clean break. As for Mumbai, it doesn’t
trip off the tongue as easily (for me at least) as Bombay, but it’s official and one should
respect that - I don't live there after all.
Penguin India seem
to view it differently. I had an email exchange with a TLS contributor recently over his
use of “Bombay” in a review – I suggested changing it to Mumbai but he pointed
out that the author of the book in question opted for
Bombay, with the clear blessing of his publishers Penguin. You say Bombay, I say Mumbai
. . . .
I think of another megacity and how
it has got its naming so right: New York,
whose names add up to one big
topographical prose poem - this is hardly an original observation I’m sure:
Upper West Side, Upper East Side, Lower East Side, Morningside Heights, Columbus
Circle, Verrazano-Narrows Bridge, F.D.R. Drive, Staten Island - the list goes
on.
Martin Amis for one saw the music in these names. Think of this riff on John
Self’s travails in Money: “My head is a city, and various pains have now taken
up residence in various parts of my face. A gum-and-bone ache has launched a
cooperative on my upper west side. Across the park, neuralgia has rented a
duplex in my fashionable east seventies. Downtown, my chin throbs with lofts of
jaw-loss. As for my brain, it’s Harlem up there, expanding in the summer
fires”.
Which brings me to the thought: can place
names be ranked aesthetically? I think they can and I’ve compiled a list of twenty
that particularly appeal to me. I’ve excluded country names, and written out of
contention names that flaunt their beauty, such as Belo Horizonte, Saratoga
Springs, Alice Springs, Pacific Palisades, Tierra del Fuego, Martha’s Vineyard,
Grimsby . . . .
It’s a very subjective thing of
course, and I’m probably revealing a tin ear here (I haven’t tried them out on
anybody). I particularly like names that are hybrids, such as Cox’s Bazar, in
Bangladesh - or ones that end in “ville” - excluding the deeply unimaginative
Townsville in Australia.

Here they are, in no particular order
– I could easily come up with 20 more and call them my favourites too, and 20
more after that: Devizes in Wiltshire, for example, or Galashiels. I kick off
with Jacksonville, although it was a close-run thing between it and Galveston,
both having that rather beautiful stress on the first syllable.

Jacksonville
New Orleans (wherever the stress
falls)
San
Francisco
Valparaíso
Asunción
La Paz
Brazzaville
Kinshasa
Khartoum
Cairo
Jeddah
Isfahan (and Suza)
Cox’s Bazar
Shanghai
Adelaide
Istanbul
Sarajevo
Nuremberg
Syracuse
Vladivostok (of course)